We love because HE first loved us

This is a testimony of Praise - JESUS I BELONG TO YOU!!


I come from a family that belonged to the fellowship of the Lutheran Church - a church where I grew up in and where my ever first "bible study" began. What I remember the most about my experiences in this church was my years as a young girl in Sunday School and the confirmation classes I attended. My biggest love for Sunday School was not only in the receiving of the beautiful stars one would get on the attendance register but mostly in completing the lessons with excellence.

The most important lesson ever in my life began at the time when I got chosen to represent our congregation in the Church's Bible quiz competitions for Sunday schools across the different regions of our country. I must have been between 9 and 10 years old at the time, however that memory is still alive and fresh even of today. I made it to the finals, and to prepare for that we were required to memorise the book of Romans chapter 12. Little did I know what a turning point this was to be for my life and just how beautiful the memories and how blessed I belief I am today because of such an opportunity and an experience. Just realising & knowing that Almighty God in His wisdom and infinite love has presented Himself always before me from around that time in my life.

I fell in love more with the book of Romans 12 that I could quote it even in my sleep. I remember how in the years of my youth whenever I was faced with challenging situations those scriptures came alive in my heart, and brought me down to my knees, humbled me and filled me with such conviction that led to repentance.

At our church back home, I recall this one specific incident, it happenned in my year of confirmation class, when this one specific family stood up to announce to the church that they were born-again. By then what I knew & ever saw/perceived about being born-again was the "freaky, crazy extremists" who always saw everybody else as a sinner except themselves and were so judgemental of others it was unbearable. A lot of people in the congregation did not take kindly to this announcement, especially because this family confronted and challenged the authority and leadership in the church publicily. This sort of behaviour became to me like an itching scar towards my belief, and in my earlier years as a teenager I got weary and sceptic about those who proclaimed to be born-again.

I still fellowshipped in our church at home until I had to go to boarding school for my high school education. Even though I believed and trusted in God, I experienced a void inside of me. This started to intensify especially when having been in church but could still find that the word that was being preached seemed to bear no impact in the behaviour and attitudes of some people even minutes after church ended. I started to feel that the way I did church was not enough for me. Something inside of me kept pushing, seeking for a difference and I began to hear the words of Romans 12 speak loudly into my life.

In my first year in boarding school, when in STD 8, I joined what was then called the SCM (Student Christian Movement). This movement was for all the learners without any specific restriction except of cause the interest to fellowship in worship and bible lessons, so this made it easier for anybody to join in without having to fear prejudice.

It was in my 2ND year at this school that I met with this one specific girl, guess what, she was born-again, yet very soft spoken and loving, always respectful in her ways and carried this stature of dignity around her. She was what my pastor often calls, bible believing, spirit filled, tongue talking & devil chasing believer in Christ. What I noticed about her was during break-times she would sneak out to a nearby building outside the school and one day I followed her, inquisitively wanting to know what was going on. This building I found out was a church/temple which belonged to the School of Theology situated right next to our school, and was opened during the day for the students to use as a quiet place of prayer and worship. This was the beginning of my most precious and best valued time period at the school - just to recall those emotions and serenity of the place during a time spent in worship and prayer was so fulfilling. Giving of ourselves unto the presence of God even for as little time as 15 minutes was so precious there are not many words to describe it.

This experience changed everything I ever perceived about being born-again. These special meetings were so intimate, a feeling so intense and a love so beautiful that the thought of it even today brings tears to my eyes. Realising it now and the remembrance of how precious God in His goodness, have shown Himself present in Love every step of the way is like what the apostle Paul decribe by saying, it is knowledge so wonderful, too high I cannot attain it.

One other beautiful witness I recall about the power of God during my high school years, was when I saw just how He changed the life of this one specific boy, known in school as the biggest Casanova, when he accepted Jesus Christ as his personal Lord and Saviour. Not only did this young man get born-again but he became so actively involved that the party events that he used to arrange were now turned over into christian camps for the "Christ for All Nations" outreaches and a number of learners in the school came to accept Jesus Christ as Lord and Saviour through his evangelistic mission.

Although in my young life I used to face challenges with my own family due to my way of belief even long before I got born-again, the biggest challenge of them all was when I wrote a letter home, full of excitement and joy, tell about my decision as a born-again believer. Little did I know what a confrontation this would be when I got home for the school holidays, just how spiteful families can be that even your own siblings and parents turns against you. Whenever I did something or missed a mark somewhere, I would be scorned about my choices that I proclaimed to believe in. I can still recall those mocking words being said with such an expression on the face - 'and this is what they call themselves followers of Jesus Christ'.
Life at home became so difficult growing up as a teenage girl, such pain I never could wish on anyone. All that I really longed for was to love and be loved by my family, that together we could be able to just hang around, do things together, understand one another, but yeah, that was just not very easy coming. It is like the song that sings 'Nobody told me the road won't be easy - I won't believe He'll bring me this far to leave me'. What was so beautiful though even during these difficult moments of pain, the words in Romans 12, learned years before, became for me an anchor in my life, and it shaped & defined my attitudes and behaviour towards life and the person I wanted to become.

I remember very clearly the prayer I so often prayed to God was for my family to be reconciled, a forgiving heart and thanking God for clothing my heart with His love that has spared me away from the spirit of hatred and shame. My adult life in itself had many of its own challenges but I always used to recall the teachings by Creflo Dollar I heared once where he shared on the scripture James 1 v 2 - 5 & 12. That too became my testimony to hold on.

I was in my mid-twenties I recall when at one time my mom and my aunts were at each others throats over a misunderstanding that truly stemmed from pride. This prompted me to make a visit to the then "missionary house" challenging the then minister of the congregation back home about his belief in prayer that changes situations, talk about boldness, what could I have been thinking? I guess this is what Prov 28 v 1 talks about. I asked if he would pray and agree with me in prayer, and so we prayed. While he was still dumbstruck, I guess by this boldness of a young woman, challenging his faith in prayer, I said my good-byes and hurried back home. That, believe me, was a move which still scares me myself even today, what on earth got into me, how could I ever confront a leader of a congregation with such a question? Well, I guess I will find my answer one day, God willing. NB! But please, whoever is reading this right now, I beg of you, please do not condemn me for that action.

Allow me to share this with you, something I even laughed with my younger sister about it yesterday while having a chat that my home has in the last six years turned out to be like a "rehabilitation centre" for the family, where those who hurt have been known to just pop-in for a little bit of love, Glory be to God, Hallelujah. Some of my siblings have even turned me into a made-up "little granny" for their kids just so they can find time to spent at my place, and How marvellous God has become in all of that. Though there is work that still needs to done in some ways, but my God has been faithful and all is not lost. His loves endures forever, and I believe He is still busy at work.

Why did I have to learn the words written in the book of Romans 12 so young in my life? What was it that it became the one thing that would ever remain, becoming so alive and forceful even when at times all I wanted so much was to take revenge and be angry with those who hurt me? Lord how come you had to make me listen to many of the stories of those women you brought along my path, their pain and sorrows? Just who am I that you made me to even learn to cry with someone that I barely knew? What is it that you were and could still be preparing me for even before I know it?

I will take refuge in your word Almighty God and seek you while you may still be found, for You have said this to your servant " For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,"
'Who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been his counsellor? Oh the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable his judgements and his paths beyond tracing out!
Preserve me Lord in your righteousness.

I thank you Lord for the musicians you so anointed in singing worship, words that heal, that restores and encourages a heart to seek repentance. It is in the solace of this anointing that Lord you became alive to me, your favour you bestowed on me and peace you gave and restored me back to joy. Thank you for your grace that does not make man arrogant, for who and where would I have been had it not been by this GRACE.

Lord, you hold my world in the palm of Your hand and I am yours forever. I will walk with You Lord where ever I go. Through tears and joy I will trust in You. I will live in all of your ways & in your promises forever and ever. Jesus I believe in You, Jesus I belong to You. You are the reason that I live, and the reason that I sing with all that I am.


"May your unfailing love come to me O Lord, your salvation according to your promise, then I will answer the one who taunts me, for I trust in your word. Do not snatch the word of truth from my mouth, for I have put my hope in your laws. I will always obey your commands for ever and ever, I will walk about in freedom for I have sought out your precepts...; I lift up my hands to your commands which I love and I meditate on your decrees." Ps 119: 41 - 45 & 48